So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Randomize