The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Randomize