I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant