I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize