It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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