Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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