Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Top reasons to NOT leave jessica to her own devices : 1. Drinking becomes a competitive sport ( in which she is the only one competing) 2.big girl words= no worky 3. Whiskey refuses to be a good friend (as much as she insists ). 4. Waking up at six a.m. still in her swim suit is super awkward. 5. It isn't a fun game to figure out which person she gave her number to and 6. Yesterdays eyeliner doesn't look good today.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
Randomize
