i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize