pedialite and red bull = repair kit
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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