Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
I'll be coming off of 7 days of not drinking. No horse tranqs either. I haven't been this sober since I was in the womb
Randomize