He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
vagina is talking i cant
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it