You can't motorboat a personality
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
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