I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize