i just stumbled downstairs, still drunk, to hug my dad and wish him a happy fathers day
but fathers day is next sunday
i realized that after i threw up on his bare feet
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
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