My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Randomize