would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
duuuude the clock in this car says its 85 past 19.
dear god, who put you in a cab?
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
Randomize
