I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
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