maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
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