The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
Are my feet made of real feet?
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Randomize
