Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
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