fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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