Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
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