we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
i dont even know how to be here
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
