So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
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