Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Randomize