Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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