I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
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