when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize