Ambien. No doubt about it.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
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