I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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