Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?