Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
turns out putting a tie on my unicorn onesie didn't make it acceptable "formal wear" and I found salsa in my cup holder
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
My early Valentine's Day one night stand just took an uber home. Thank you, technology, for letting me enjoy this day in peace. 😍