i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
I think pants incapable of making pants work
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
Randomize