Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
when did we get so old that our friends started having LEGITIMATE children?
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
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