We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
I just found puke in my bra..
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.