She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
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Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
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Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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