i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
Randomize
