He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
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