my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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