Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.