I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Randomize
