Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
