he wants to bone in the snuggie
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize