You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize