That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Randomize