fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.