Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
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