Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
there was a trapeze. enough said
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
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