we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
Randomize
