I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
So drunk, too bad you don't want this
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
